Solid Gold Sh!t

Dear Friends--

As you may have heard, I'm on the night shift for awhile.  I originally intended for it to be six weeks of cooking fun, but mostly I have been keeping up with the Kardashians and the other trashy television stars who show up after 2 am. I have gotten off the couch long enough to get a couple new recipes in the works, but nothing's been perfected yet except my memorization of the new Insanity infomercial in its entirety.

In the meantime, I've been gorging myself on what I call "Solid Gold Sh!t" (bonus points if you catch the Love Actually reference).  This is the foodgroup that consists of a whole bunch of semi- to very healthy ingredients put together in such proportions, quantities, or iterations that they lose most semblance of nutrition altogether.  Put simply: Solid Gold Sh!t is junk food that sounds healthy but probably isn't.

Some favorites:

SO Delicious makes gluten-free, no-sugar-added ice cream. The chocolate flavor is by far the best, though the mint chip ain't bad either.  The state of Virginia may outlaw "pinting and driving" soon, as I've been known to try and brave traffic while housing one of these puppies!

Probably my favorite treat on the planet right now, Coco-Roons have the texture of a delicious cookie and the sweetness of a real lemon pie. Sadly, these guys run about $8.99/package, and nursing just can't support the habit all that often... but a girl can dream.

These chips right HERE taste like corn chips, but the first ingredient is PEAS! I had every intention of making a superbowl taco dip with these but then got really lazy and just ate the whole bag. These guys are also BFKef approved, so you know they taste like the real thing.

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A Very Kefi Christmas

"It is a miracle if you can find true friends, and it is a miracle if you have enough food to eat, and it is a miracle if you get to spend your days and evenings doing whatever it is you like to do, and the holiday season—like all the other seasons—is a good time not only to tell stories of miracles, but to think about the miracles in your own life, and to be grateful for them." —Lemony Snicket








There are many things that have afforded me great success in this world-- I'm a white person from the US who went to college and is employed.  To 99.99% of the rest of the world, I wasn't just born on third--I came onto Earth an inch from home plate.

Few things have made me feel as privileged as this past weekend, when my family got together to celebrate a pre-Christmas Extravaganza with me before I headed back to DC to work both Christmas Eve and Christmas Day.  It was an amazing 36-hour love fest that featured all of the people I hold dearest, from the family with which I was born to the mish-mash of folks I have chosen over the years to count among my people.  

The Kefis have always believed in a big, fat, decorative Christmas, but our winter holidays have not always been as movie-esque as this one was-- those years that began when the oldest of my siblings became a teenager and ended when the youngest of us left adolescence behind brought as much angst and posturing around the holidays for us as they did any other family.  We worked hard for our practically-perfect pre-Christmas, and it made me think about how wonderfully lucky we are if, as adults, we can move past the family squabbles about presents and table turf that our complicated world increasingly encourages, and remember how truly magic Christmas can be, if only we bring to the table with us best wishes for each other and a healthy sense of humor about ourselves (making Christmas a champagne-only event doesn't hurt, either).

It is, of course, more than happy circumstance that my family gets to enjoy holidays like these at a time when so many families are splintered by the demands of our world.  In some other post at some other time, I will wax and wane on how closely linked happiness is to privilege.  But, for now, let me say without hope or agenda--just because it's Christmas, and at Christmas you tell the truth--to me, we are perfect.  

 

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In case you still don't know what kefi means...

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Return of the JetSet Kef

Big Brother Kef is back in town. Usually it is my dear sister who does the dirty work in the kitchen while I keep the water boiling as the Executive Sous Chef of Keftown (see here for more on that).  But, inspired by the post-DNC 2012 "Clinton bump," she's decided to call in the old dogs to teach some new tricks.  During her tenure, two very prominent themes have emerged:

• dishes are meatless
• photos of said meatless dishes range from unappetizing to "...oh, I see how that might actually taste good if that were a better picture." (I love my sister and her food--but seriously, she really could have benefited from the photography class all the "artsy" kids in our high school took junior year.)

So after months of hiatus from this blog, it is with great pleasure that I break one of these trends and bring you today a great MEAT recipe I promise you will come out beautifully...except you'll have to make do with a truly non-illustrative picture in typical CUK style.  I assume by now you are used to this. LebKef and I made this dish together for Greek Easter 2012 in Beirut and it was a show stopper.  Look closely at the picture below and you will find this perfectly-prepared lamb in between lots of other wonderfully-made dishes:

Still don't think this lamb will be the best thing you put in your mouth this week? Ask yourself this: would a man who willingly dresses like this

ever steer you wrong when it comes to some lamb? I don't think so.


LebKef's Lamb Chop

Ingredients

• 3 tbs Dijon Mustard
• 6 tbs Balsamic Vinegar
• 2 medium cloves of garlic
• 1 c extra-virgin olive oil
• kosher salt (to taste)
• ground black pepper (to taste)
• 3 sprigs rosemary
• 1 double rack lamb rib chops, or 8 lamb loin chops

Assembly  

1. FOR THE VINAIGRETTE: Combine Dijon, balsamic vinegar, and garlic in non reactive metal bowl. Whisk in extra virgin olive oil. Remove rosemary needles from sprig. Chop and add to vinaigrette. Season with salt and pepper.

 2. Cut lamb into individual chops by cutting down between the bones (each bone should have a nice round piece of meat attached).In plastic bag with half of the marinade, marinade for 10 minutes (or up to 2 hours in the refrigerator). Reserve half of marinade for finishing chops with sauce for serving.

3. Heat a gas or charcoal grill to medium to high heat.Remove chops from marinade. Wipe off excess liquid and season chops with salt and pepper.

4. Grill chops for 2 to 3 minutes per side (or until meat is medium rare).

5. Remove chops from grill and allow to rest for 5 minutes. Serve lamb chops with reserved marinade.

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...And They're Off!

It is truly the most wonderful time of the year!

Every year my brother JetSet Kef and I take off on vacation together, usually in the Augustish part of the summer. Inspired by our Mediterranean brethren, the Italians, we have come to refer to this tradition as Ferragosto.

Below, please find some highlights of Ferragosto through the years:

 2009 was Kanafe and Catastrophe. JSK was living in Ramallah, so I scidaddled over there for some fun in the sun.

We also bid a fond farewell to a dear friend, the Burka of the Beach. May her memory be eternal.

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2010 was the year of the Berry Loop. We met in the Pacific Northwest to explore the finer points of slower, organic American living. Although the food was enough to keep us in that part of the country forever, we grew tired of people asking us to slow down our talking and driving. East Cost for life!

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In 2011 we actually had TWO vacations. First, a trip to the motherland, Greece!

At dinner in this restaurant, Cooking up Kefi was born. Thank you, Lindos!

Later that week, JSK and I got up to our usual shenanigans + wine and traditional Greek dancing. The next morning was less awesome.

After Greece, we jetted off to Mozambique (where else?) for some scuba diving and life-changing scenery.

Just rotate your laptop. It's really a cute pic.

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This year, it's a return to Greece. See you in two weeks, folks!

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Lakis: May His Memory Be Eternal

On this, his name day and anniversary of death, we remember my grandfather. Pictured above enjoying kefi with his lifelong friend Costas and below at the opening of the Fireside Diner. It is undoubtedly his presence in heaven that has kept Barack Obama from successfully staging the modern American military coup. Take it easy, take it easy!

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The REAL Chef Kef

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Greek Easter 2012 Preview

The table, still missing a few dishes

Peep-shaped butter dish, courtesy of Mama Kef.

Sadly, I did not make the cheese. I did make the jam.

I also made a gluten-free version of this- yum and a half.

Spanakopita

The 10 lb pastitsio.

Many, many thanks to everyone who came out and made it a Greek Easter to remember. And the biggest thanks to our host, KefiKathleen, who saved us all from my cramped apartment and provided us with a beautiful outdoor space to enjoy a beautiful spring night.

I'll post specific stories and recipes in the weeks coming, including reports from Beirut, where JetSet Kef held his own Greek Easter feast.

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The Marathon Begins

The first spanakopita of Greek Easter 2012 has just gone into the oven, which gives me a second to pause and think about why I spend an entire weekend every year covered in olive oil and spinach.

There are two main reasons that keep me looking forward to this time each year.  The first is that Orthodox Easter is usually 1-2 weeks behind Roman Easter, which reminds us that Jesus was, in fact, a socialist and that he ascribed to the more relaxed lifestyle of the Southern Mediterranean and took his sweet time rising from the dead (I mean, wouldn't you?). The second (and more legit) reason I so look forward to Greek Easter is that it brings back all the Keftastic memories of the times my family was less scattered across this green earth.

As a kid, we would squeeze into the Camry (JetSet Kef on the driver's side with his GameBoy, BabyKef in the middle annoying the living bejesus out of her siblings, and yours truly trying desperately not to get car sick on the passenger's side) and drive to New Jersey.  There, we would find a diner that had been transformed from a bustling business to an inviting living room--the tables were rearranged to accommodate what seemed like every Greek in New Jersey, and for that one day, traditional Greek music played louder than the Whitney Houston coming from the juke boxes.  It was always nice to see my grandfather's friends and eat something other than the diner's famous "Chicken in a Basket"--but what I REALLY looked forward to was what we called "the red egg game."

You can read more about the game here-- I gotta go get the spanakopita out of the oven.  I leave you with a picture of my grandfather on one of his happiest days, when my brother convened the first KefiFamily Greek Easter in years.  We'll miss my grandfather this year, but I know he is watching with approval and ranting about Barack Obama the Communist from Heaven. Σας αγαπάμε, παππού!

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Muppets Go Greek

Happy Tuesday, good people! Enjoy this little bit of Greek love.

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