Caprese Empanadas

Empanadas have got to be one of the greatest foods on the planet.  I mean really- what's better than a no-fork-required doughy treat with a surprise filling? I rest my case.

I expected this to be one of the recipes I had to sell to the Kef crowd--but I was surprised by how quick and easy this recipe turned out to be. I made the sad mistake of burning mine, so be careful in the final baking stage not to overcook. The dough is paleo-approved (the cheesy filling decidedly not so), and the great news is you can fill these guys with just about anything you like for a great result.

Have a great weekend!

Caprese Empanadas
Ingredients

For the Dough

• 1.5 c unsweetened shredded coconut flakes
• 1 c almond meal
• 1/2 c arrowroot powder (I know...I know. I didn't have it in my kitchen, either)
• 1/2 tsp salt
• 2 eggs
• 1 TBS apple cider vinegar (lemon juice would be a good sub here)
• 1 TBS watered
• oil of your choice for brushing empanadas

--
For the Filling

• 10 cherry tomatoes
• 5 oz mozzarella cheese
• 1/2 cup basil
• tomato sauce for dipping (optional)

Assembly
1. Preheat the oven to 350F. Grind the almond meal and coconut into a fine powder using a food processor.  Scrape the bottom and sides of processor bowl and grind again for about 2 more minutes.

2. Add arrowroot and salt to processor and mix again until combined. Add eggs and vinegar and mix in processor again until a cohesive dough forms--mine actually formed itself into a lovely dough ball. If necessary, add water 1 TBS at a time (I needed 1 TBS to get all the dough together). 

3. Gather the dough into a firm ball. Generously dust a sheet of wax paper with arrowroot powder and roll the ball in it to dust all sides. Place another sheet of wax paper on top and roll out to 1/8-inch thick (I was at BFKef's and used a wine bottle...make do with whatcha got). Use anything hard, round, and about 6 inches in diameter (I used a small Tupperware) to cut out 5-6 empanadas. You will probably have to cut a few, reform the ball and roll out two or three times in total to use all the dough.  Place your circles on an ungreased baking sheet.

4. To make the filling, finely dice and mix the basil, cheese, and tomatoes. Place on each circle 1-1.5 TBS  of filling --RESIST THE URGE TO OVERFILL. Fold in half and "crimp" the ends together to seal the empanada. Crimping an empanada requires about the same skill level as crimping your hair -- just get to scrunching. Once sealed, brush generously with oil.

5. Bake for 15-20 minutes, depending on the size of your empanadas. To brown them, turn the oven to "broil" for the last two minutes--BUT BE SURE TO WATCH LIKE A HAWK. I left mine for about 30 seconds too long and nearly ruined the whole shebang. Let cool and enjoy! If you'd like, use a tomato sauce for dipping.

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Greek Yogurt Breakfast Tart

One of the great things about working with a gaggle of 20-something women: the magazines that clutter the break room, nurses' station, and nursery. Some people use trashy television to decompress--for me, it's the glossy page.  I never finish the love quizzes or follow any of the make up advice, but I usually find inspiration in the recipe section--and yes, I am that person who rips the recipe page out of the back and keeps you from finishing the article about some woman's harrowing experience with credit card debt or a baby switched at birth. And that, my friends, is where we found this guy:

The good people at Better Homes & Gardens came up with this Greek yogurt tart with a cornflake crust.  It's quick, painless, and you can do the whole thing in one bowl (which is a big plus for the queen of leaving dirty dishes around).  This crust is DELICIOUS and I will definitely use it again for no-bake fillings.  The filling itself ends up tasting like set vanilla yogurt, as the gelatin robs the Greek yogurt of its creaminess--so this is definitely tasty but not a gamechanger. Next time, I will probably add some cream cheese or goat's cheese to keep the creaminess (maybe even use the filling from this pie), but this would be a great addition to any brunch gathering as is.

Greek Yogurt Tart with Cornflake Crust

Ingredients

• 1 1/4 c crushed cornflakes, which took me about 3 c whole corn flakes (Arrowhead Mills makes a gf/sf version)
• 1/3 c butter, melted
• 3 TBS packed brown sugar (I used coconut sugar)
• 1 envelope unflavored gelatin
• 1/4 c water
• 1 1/4 c plain Greek yogurt (FIBBYDY)
• 1/2 c milk
• 1/4 c honey
• 1 tsp vanilla
• 1 medium orange
• 1/4 c orange marmalade (optional)

Assembly
1. Preheat oven to 375F. Combine crushed cornflakes, melted butter, and sugar in a small mixing bowl. Press into the bottom and up the sides of tart pan with removable sides (if you don't have one, any tin pan will do, it just won't look as pretty). Bake for 8-10 minutes, until golden brown. Set aside to cool.

2. Put water in a small microwave-safe bowl. Sprinkle gelatin over water, let stand for 5 minutes. Microwave on high for 20 seconds (stir at halfway point), or until gelatin is dissolved.  In a separate bowl, whisk together yogurt, milk, honey, and vanilla. Whisk in gelatin/water until completely combined. Pour mixture into cooled crust. Chill for at least 4 hours, but overnight is preferable.

3. When ready to serve, peel orange and heat marmalade until just melted. Cut orange however you'd like and decorate the top of tart. Drizzle or brush marmalade over oranges. Serve and enjoy!

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Roasted Eggplant with Buttermilk Yogurt Sauce

Lordy Lou. Hold the damn boat. Holy Moly. Sweet Lord Baby Jesus. Insert other absurd Chef Kefi, RN exclamation here. Ready for a recipe that comes from one of the world's most revered vegetarian kitchens and requires NO culinary skill whatsoever? Read on, young grasshopper. 

So many amazing pictures of this recipe all over the internet that I just couldn't choose! My rendition is the bottom right photo.

The background: A few weeks ago, JetSet Kef implied that I would never reach full yiayia status until I pick up a copy of of Plenty, the vegetarian cookbook written by Yotam Ottolenghi, and master several recipes.  I was, of course, indignant--sure, this guy has 4 incredibly-successful London restaurants and grew up growing his own garden in Mediterranean soil...but I am Chef Kefi, RN for chrissakes.  Hmph.

And then I saw the cover photo. Halved eggplant roasted and smothered in some delicious creamy sauce (which, you already know, we love in Keftown), then topped with POMEGRANATE seeds? Uncle Frank...Is this a joke?!  Where the eff has this book been all my life?

I became bewitched, body and soul, by this recipe. Within minutes of the cookbook's arrival I was at Whole Foods, where I have been scoffing at the out-of-season $6 pomegranates all winter--ONLY TO FIND THEY WERE OUT OF POMEGRANATES IN MY MOMENT OF NEED. Undeterred, I went to three more grocery stores, after which it became evident that the entire food industry conspiring against me and my dream of making this recipe.  I called an audible on the whole thing and switched the pom seeds for a balsamic-pomagranate reduction, and this was still one of my favorite things to come out of my kitchen.  All's well that ends well, I suppose--but I won't pass up one of those $6 out-of-season gifts from the Gods again.

This is hide-your-kids-hide-your-wife good. If Oprah invited me on her show right now, I would jump all over that damn couch proclaiming my love for this. I keep trying to wrap up this post but can't find the right punctuation for my new beloved--so just go find some pomegranates and get to it!

Roasted Eggplant with Yogurt Buttermilk Sauce

Ingredients

• 2 eggplants, large and long
• 1/3 c olive oil
• 1 bunch of fresh thyme (the minipack is enough for the whole recipe)
• salt and pepper, to taste
• Greek season, za'atar, or other spice sachet you like, to taste

----

• 1 pomegrante

OR

• 1 1/2 c balsamic vinegar
• 8 oz pom juice
• 5 sprigs thyme
• 5 garlic cloves, minced

---

• 9 TBS buttermilk
• 1/2 c Greek Yogurt (FIBBYDY)
• 1 1/2 TBS olive oil
• 1 small garlic clove, minced
• pinch of salt

Assembly
1. Preheat oven to 400F. Cut eggplants in half lengthwise, even cutting through the green stem (which you won't eat--it's just there to look nice).  Use a small sharp knife and cut three-four parallel lines across the width of the eggplant, careful not to go through the skin.  Repeat 45 degree angle with 3-4 more cuts, making a diamond-shaped pattern (think of it as 4 tally marks and then parallel diagonal lines like you use to show 5 in when keeping tally). 

2. Put the eggplant skin-side-down (flesh up) on a parchment-lined baking sheet. Distribute the entire 1/3 c olive oil between the 4 pieces by brushing it on until the entire amount has been absorbed (which will not take much time, as eggplant is about the most liquid-greedy vegetable out there). Sprinkle with thyme leaves (I put about 2 tsp of fresh thyme on each) and Greek seasoning or za'tar. Roast for 35-40 minutes, until flesh is soft and a nice-looking brown. A knife should very easily move through the roasted flesh. Remove from oven and let cool.

3. While roasting eggplant, whisk together all the sauce ingredients. Taste and add more season for flavor if you feel so inclined. Keep cold until serving.

4. Prepare your pomegranate seeds or balsamic reduction.  To learn how to separate seeds, watch this video. To make balsamic reduction, combine balsamic vinegar, pom juice, leaves from 5 thyme sprigs, and garlic cloves in a medium pot.  Bring to boil, then simmer for 12-15 minutes, until liquid has reduced by about 1/3. This will make way more than you need--keep the rest in fridge and put it on everything or use as a salad dressing.

5. To serve, put lots and lots and lots of buttermilk over the eggplant. Season with more Greek seasoning or za'tar and generous amounts of seeds or reduction. Spread the love for this recipe far and wide!

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Eggplant Rolldakia

There is nothing in this world as relaxing to me as an afternoon in the kitchen. Luckily, I found some time during this crazy week to throw open the windows, enjoy the 55 degree weather, blast the Erykah Badu Pandora station (if you don't know, now you know), and tinker about with some potential additions to the Greek Easter line up.

I loved making these eggplant rolldakia (alternate Kef name "Egg(plant) Rolls," but the Greek won out over the pun this time). The inspiration came from this vegan version, but I had to cheese mine way up.

Eggplant Rolldakia

Ingredients

• 1 jar of your favorite tomato sauce (my money is on smoky marinara)
• 3 medium-large eggplant (length more important than girth in this case)
• salt to sprinkle
• olive oil
• 30 oz ricotta cheese
• 8-12 oz feta, depending on how feta-y you like your filling to taste
• 1/2 c grated romano (or parmesan if you are working with a nurse's budget, like me)
• 1 egg, lightly beaten
• 1/2 c minced basil
• 4-5 cloves minced garlic

Assembly

1. Preheat oven to 375. Lightly grease rimmed 2-3 baking pans and let them heat up in the oven as it preheats. Put ricotta cheese in a strainer to get rid of excess liquid. Wash eggplant, chop off the stems. Slice eggplants vertically into thin strips, aiming for slices that are 1/2 inch thick or less. I found that I did a crappy job on the first one but had the skill honed by the third eggplant--so learning curve ain't a steep one. Lay slices on clean dish towels or paper towels, sprinkle fairly generously with salt and let sit for 15 minutes or so--you will see the excess water come to top of each slice.

2. As the eggplant slices sit in salt, stir in a bowl until combined the ricotta, feta, romano, egg, and basil. 

3. Wipe off the moisture from the top of the slices. Arrange slices in a single layer on the hot pans--they will probably not all fit in one round. Cook in oven until slightly browned on bottom, about 5 minutes. Flip and cook another 4-5 minutes more so other side browns as well. Once both sides are slightly browned, take off pan and let cool. Repeat until you've gone through all the slices.

4. As you work through browning all the slices, start filling the cooled eggplant with cheese. Put 1-1.5 TBS of filling at one end of a slice and roll tightly, finishing with the seam down. Repeat until either filling or slices run out (I had some extra filling left over).

5. Arrange on a rimmed baking sheet (no need to regrease). Don't let them touch, but the rolls can be very close together. Mine fit on one large pan. Distribute tomato sauce among rolls, spreading it between and over them.

6. Bake for 15-20 minutes. Rolldakia are done when the eggplant look more brown than white--sorry that is the best way I can describe it. If you take them out and they are not easily sliced with a knife, they are not done.

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Bright Beginnings: Gf/Sf Blueberry Muffins

Yum a dum dum. The sun is shining, the birds are singing, and these blueberry muffins are a grainfree, easy-peasey way to feed a crowd. Thanks to Guilty Kitchen!

Sometimes gf/sf cooking can be an exercise in abstraction, as baked goods can easily become an interpretation of the intended treat rather than a version of it. These muffins, however, are the real deal and  I was impressed by how very recognizably blueberry muffiny they tasted.  I admit that coconut flour is a huge moisture suck, but the resulting teensy lack of moisture was not enough to stop me from eating three...a day.

When I was in seventh grade, I spent a few weeks learning html so I could build an awesome website on Geocities. I'm dusting off the ol' coding cap to upgrade Cooking Up Kefi--so bear with me as I figure out how to tweak the new template.

Gf/Sf Blueberry Muffins

Ingredients

• 3/4 c coconut flour
• 1/4 tsp salt
• 1/4 tsp + pinch baking soda
• 1/4 tsp cinnamon
• dash nutmeg
• 6 eggs
• 1/3 c maple syrup
• 1/3 c Greek yogurt (FIBYDY)
• 1 TBSP vanilla extract
• 1/3 c + 3 TBSP coconut oil, melted
• 12 oz frozen blueberries (I used 10 oz and think the extra berries would have helped the moisture issue)

Assembly

1. Preheat oven to 350. Line muffin tins with paper or lightly grease each muffin hole.

2. Combine dry ingredients.

3. Add wet ingredients to dry mixture and stir until lumps are out--it won't be perfectly smooth, but it'll do.

4. Spoon into muffin tins until each is nearly full, as these guys don't rise too too much. Bake 25-30 minutes, or until you can stick a fork in them and it comes out clean.

5. Let cool completely before gobbling up.

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Salmon Avgolemono

Full disclosure: I did not take this picture. But you already knew that.

I did, however, make a very delicious salmon avgolemono. So now glance at that picture again and then imagine a delicious piece of salmon where that roasted chicken is hanging out. That's what I ate for lunch and dinner on Sunday.

This is one of those Greek recipes that sounds more bizarre than it is--trust me when I say that you will never combine lemon, eggs, and rice in a more delicious way.

We are moving into High Holy season here-- the countdown to Greek Easter is on and the final Ferragosto decision has been made (sailing in the Cyclades Islands, thank you very much), so expect an uptick in the number of Greek-related recipes.

In other news: we apparently gain 3 minutes of daylight per day in March. Need I say more?

Salmon Avgolemono
Ingredients

• 2 lbs salmon, skin off
• 1 large red onion, chopped
• 3 lemons
• 3 eggs, separated into whites and yolks
• 3/4 c grain of your choice (cous cous, rice, orzo, pasta, whatever)
• 3 tsp salt
• 1 tsp pepper
• 2 tsp fresh oregano (or 1 tsp dried oregano)

Assembly
1.Preheat the oven to broil. In a medium pot, put the salmon and chopped onions in just enough water so that the salmon is covered. Add 1 tsp salt and let water boil. Boil the salmon until it is cooked through--this took me about 8 or 9 minutes, but will depend on the cut of salmon, thickness of pot, etc The key is not to let it boil much longer than necessary. 

2. Take salmon out of pan and put it on a broiler-proof pan (preferably a rimmed one) with the onions (but leave water in pot--don't throw it out!). Mix together in a small bowl juice from 1 lemon, 2 TBS olive oil, 1/2 tsp pepper, half the oregano, and a tsp of salt. Dump this mixture over the salmon/onions--it will seem an excessive amount but you will be glad later that you did. Broil the salmon/onions until the salmon is gold on top, which took me 7 minutes or so (note: I have an extremely small oven so don't be surprised if yours takes longer).
3. While the salmon cooks, add 2 c water and 1 tsp salt to the pot from before and bring it back to a boil.  Add your grain, cook it according to normal instructions and remove pot from heat when finished.
4. Using a standing mixer, hand mixer, or plain-ol whisk, beat the egg whites until a good foam has formed on the top.  One at a time, mix in the egg yolks and juice from remaining two lemons, fully incorporating each before adding the next (I did yolks first, then juice but it probably doesn't matter)
5. When the broth has reached room temp (and not a degree before!), keep whisking and slowly add the broth into the egg mixture.  AGAIN: you should be whisking in its entirety. Keep whisking until the broth gets thick and frothy. Then add remaining oregano and salt/pepper if you feel so inclined.  Serve warm (mine got thicker, creamier, and frothier once I heated it back up in the microwave) either over the salmon/grain or on the side as pictured above. I poured mine right over top, which ruined the chances of getting a good picture but made for a very, very delicious lunch!
.
  

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Carrot Chickpea Raisin Salad

The end is here! I'm off nights and back to the world of the living. Praise. The. Lord.

This night shift was especially tough on my diet-- the combination of weird hours, dark nights, and cold weather is enough to send a woman straight to the all-gluten, all-sugar, everything-processed section of the grocery store. Basically, I was what needed to be cleaned up on aisle 9.

So now that it's done we're in full-on detox mode, which means more vegetables and less SGS. Never fear--I still have to post some quality cookies, muffins, and cakes made during my interlude as a vampire-- so it won't all be healthy. In the words of my dear friend, Mel (Kef name forthcoming): Never that.

Carrot Chickpea Raisin Salad

                                                                                     Ingredients

• 1 can of chickpeas
• 1 medium onion, cut in quarters

1 bay leaf

1 cup carrots, shredded

1/2 c raisins

3-5 tbsp of olive oil

2 tbsp fresh mint, finely chopped

juice of 1 lemon

1/2 tbsp apple cider vinegar 1 pinch cumin

1 pinch coriander

1/4- 1/2 c spring onions, finely chopped

 Assembly:

 1. Drain chickpeas and throw out water from can. Throw the chickpeas, quartered onion, and bay leaf in a pot that will fit them all without squishing them too much. Boil on medium heat for 20-30 min, until they are tender but not overcooked. Once tender, use a strainer to drain the chickpeas. Throw out onion and bayleaf.
 

2. In a large bowl, combine the chickpeas, carrots, and raisins and drizzle with the oil to taste.
 

3. Add the rest of the ingredients and mix thoroughly. Serve the salad room temp or cold.

Thanks to Tastespotting for bringing us this one!

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Solid Gold Sh!t

Dear Friends--

As you may have heard, I'm on the night shift for awhile.  I originally intended for it to be six weeks of cooking fun, but mostly I have been keeping up with the Kardashians and the other trashy television stars who show up after 2 am. I have gotten off the couch long enough to get a couple new recipes in the works, but nothing's been perfected yet except my memorization of the new Insanity infomercial in its entirety.

In the meantime, I've been gorging myself on what I call "Solid Gold Sh!t" (bonus points if you catch the Love Actually reference).  This is the foodgroup that consists of a whole bunch of semi- to very healthy ingredients put together in such proportions, quantities, or iterations that they lose most semblance of nutrition altogether.  Put simply: Solid Gold Sh!t is junk food that sounds healthy but probably isn't.

Some favorites:

SO Delicious makes gluten-free, no-sugar-added ice cream. The chocolate flavor is by far the best, though the mint chip ain't bad either.  The state of Virginia may outlaw "pinting and driving" soon, as I've been known to try and brave traffic while housing one of these puppies!

Probably my favorite treat on the planet right now, Coco-Roons have the texture of a delicious cookie and the sweetness of a real lemon pie. Sadly, these guys run about $8.99/package, and nursing just can't support the habit all that often... but a girl can dream.

These chips right HERE taste like corn chips, but the first ingredient is PEAS! I had every intention of making a superbowl taco dip with these but then got really lazy and just ate the whole bag. These guys are also BFKef approved, so you know they taste like the real thing.

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A Brunchypoo for Obama

As you may have heard, a fairly large event took place this week in Washington, DC. Last time around, I left the house at 3 am and slept under the Department of Labor in freezing temperatures to watch B.H.S. on a jumbotron from 15 blocks away.   Not even a little bit interested in doing that a second time, I invited some dear friends over for a little brunchypoo.

FatherKef is a big fan of breakfast-making, and especially loves to make a cheesey frittata when there are enough people around to eat the whole thing. He got the recipe from a man named Tyler who is apparently on the Food Network and, as such, this dish is referred to as 'a Tyler' in the Kef household.

I also made a batch of blueberry foccacia, which is most definitely NOT gluten free but I devoured anyway. Whoopsies.

Cheesey Potato Frittata

Ingredients

• 8 extra-large eggs
• 2 TBS heavy cream
• 1 c grated Gruyere cheese
• Kosher salt and freshly ground black pepper, to taste
• 1 TBS unsalted butter
• 1 small onion, diced
• 4 small red potatoes, diced
• 1 c diced smoked ham or Canadian bacon (optional)
• 1 c grated Parmigiano-Reggiano, for finishing top
• 1/4 cup sour cream
• 1 bunch chives, chopped

Assembly
1. Preheat oven to 400 degrees F.

2. In a large bowl, whisk together eggs, cream, Gruyere cheese, salt, and pepper until foamy. Melt butter over medium-large heat--make sure this pan can be transferred to the oven (it will say on the bottom "oven safe" and should NOT have a rubber handle!). Add the onion and potatoes and cook thoroughly.

3. Pour the egg mixture over the top. Pull the edges away from the sides of the pan with a spatula so the eggs flow to the bottom of the pan. When the frittata is half set, add the ham if using it.

4. Transfer the pan to the heated oven. Bake for 10 minutes until puffed and golden, with firm (but not dry) center.

5. Remove from oven.  FatherKef has developed an amazing technique for this last part--grab a big serving dish, cover pan and flip in one swoop so that frittata is now right-side-up and on dish. Shower with grated Parmesan and serve garnished with sour cream and chives.

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Sweet 'n' Salty Almond Butter Cups

In the words of my dear friend GingerKef, "Wowowowowowowowowowow!" 

I've been eyeing all the iterations of homemade Reese's cups out there on the interwebs, but none have been exactly sugar-free--the recipes I've seen have called for some kind sugar for either the nut butter or the chocolate shell. That ends now.

I played around with these puppies last night, and was amazed to find how easy they really are.  BF Kef was HUGE fan and promptly enjoyed two of these fancy little treats. They're a little sweet, a little salty, and a delicious replacement for any Reese's lover.

You'll have lots of almond butter left over--keep it in a container at room temp and enjoy it on apples, bananas, toast, and everything else on which almond butter is awesome.


Ingredients

• 2 c slivered almonds
• 2 c unsweetened shredded coconut
• 1/2 tsp vanilla extract
• 1/4-1/2 tsp salt
• 10oz bag of unsweetened carob chip (or dark chocolate over 50% if you prefer)

Assembly
1. Preheat oven to 350. Put an ungreased cupcake tin in the freezer.
2. Spread almonds out on a rimmed baking pan. Roast in oven for 10 minutes, until lightly browned.
3. While almonds roast, put coconut and in a food processor. Blend until buttery, which will take about 10 minutes. About half way through, add the vanilla extract to keep the mixer moving.
4. Once roasted, let almonds cool for 2-3 minutes, then add the nuts, 1/4 c of the carob chips and salt to the coconut/vanilla mix in food processor. Blend until the mixture resembles a loose nut butter. Check for taste, and add another 1/4 c of carob chips if you feel so inclined. Set aside.
5. Heat a deep pot of water to a low boil. Remove cupcake tin from freeze. Place remaining carob chips in a handheld pot small enough to hold over the boiling water.  Stirring very frequently, place the small pot over the hot water (but try to keep bottom from touching water) and allow carob to melt. This will take 3-5 minutes. 
6. Using a spatula, divide the carob between each cupcake hole--each one should get enough to cover the bottom completely. Move quickly so the carob does not re-harden (if it starts to get firm again, put back over the boiling water for a few seconds and stir). It will not be pretty. Then, use the back of a metal spoon to smooth out the melted carob and push some up the sides of the tin. Again--it will not be pretty, just do what you can.
7. Add about 1 TBS of almond butter to each cupcake holder and smooth. We liked these without a top layer of carob--but if you have any left over, go ahead and pour it over the almond butter to make a final layer of "chocolate." Put cupcake tin back in freezer for 15-30 minutes. Once frozen, remove from cupcake forms and let come to room temperature before enjoying.

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Paulatimi's Fabulous Fudge

My mother has been known to bake dozens of Christmas cookies each year.  No--not a few dozen chocolate chip cookies... dozens of KINDS of cookies. Monster cookies, peanut butter surprise cookies, oatmeal raisin, white-chocolate cranberry, Linzer, sugar, gingerbread... the list goes on.

Paula's famous party platter--no one goes home with one!
Fudge is those tan squares with red/green M&Ms.

But none are as good as her famous no-bake M&M fudge. This is definitively NOT sugar free-- in fact, it falls into the same sickly sweet category as my other favorite seasonal treats (candy corn and Peeps--don't judge me), but I fall for it everytime. My advice? Cut small and make sure you have reinforcements to help you eat!

Ingredients

• 2 1/2 cups of sugar
• 3/4 cup butter 2/3 cup (5 1/3 oz) evaporated milk
• 1/2 teaspoon salt
• 1 1/2 cups creamy peanut butter
• 1 jar (7oz) marshallow fluff
• 1 teaspoon vanilla
• 1 1/2 cups m&m's plain (use colors for an easy themed dessert--MamaKef uses red and green at Christmas, I use team colors for the Super Bowl, etc)

Assembly

1. Combine sugar, butter, milk, and salt in heavy 3 qt sausepan; bring to full rolling boil over high heat, STIRRING CONSTANTLY with a wooden spoon.  Continue boiling over med heat 5 min stirring constantly. 2. Remove from heat; stir in peanut butter until melted.
3. Add marshmallow fluff; mix until blended. Fold in M&Ms; immediately spread into greased 13 x9 inch baking pan.
4. Cool at room temperature; cut into squares.
Makes one 13x9 inch pan of fudge (about 3 lbs).

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Not Just Another Corn Casserole

The Extended Family Kef loves a good corn casserole. We have several versions, but this is maybe the best...depending on who you ask. This one is brought to you by ChampagneOnly Kef (mother of CafeKef, dear friend of MamaKef), who has been pioneering the gluten-free life since 1997.

Ingredients

• 1.5 c water
• 1/2 tsp salt 
• 1.5 c milk
• 3/4 c stone-ground cornmeal
• 1.5 TBS butter
• 2 eggs
• 1/2 tsp baking powder
• 2 green onions, finely chopped
• 1/4 tsp black pepper
• 1.5 c corn kernels (canned, frozen, fresh...whatever)
• 3 TBS parmesan cheese, grated

Assembly
1. Preheat oven to 400F. Grease casserole dish (1.5 qt if you have it).
2. In large sauce pan, heat water, salt, and half of milk on high until it boils. Reduce heat to medium-low and whisk in the corn meal gradually. Cover and simmer until the mixture becomes thick and pasty-ish. Whisk frequently. This should take about 10 minutes.
3. Remove corn mixture from heat and whisk in butter until melted. Keep whisking and add remaining milk gradually. Whisk in eggs one at a time, and then the baking powder.
4. Stir in green onions, corn, Parmesan, and pepper until combined. Pour into the casserole dish and use a spatula to smooth top.
5. Bake 45-60 minutes, until golden and knife comes out clean. 

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Can't-Believe-It's-Not-Take-Out Shrimp Fried "Rice"

There's no run-up to this one: last night I made the most delicious imitation ever-- shrimp fried "rice" that uses my favorite culinary chameleon, cauliflower, instead of rice. Don't be intimidated by the long ingredient list-- this dish is actually quite easy and would be great for a cozy dinner party on an ugly winter night. Enjoy!

Thanks to Tastespotting for bringing me this recipe

If you have two frying pans, you'll need both. If not, just make the cauliflower and then the vegetables.
Ingredients 
--1/4 c water 

--3 TBS fresh lime juice (to taste)

--2 TBS green curry paste (international aisle)

--1 TBS + 1 tsp honey or agave

--1/2 tsp apple cider vinegar

---

--3 c cauliflower, grated (about 1 large head)
--2-3 TBS coconut oil (or whatever oil you like)
--1 c carrots, diced
--1 c onion, diced
--3-5 garlic cloves, minced
--1 c shrimp, chopped  
--2 large eggs, beaten lightly 
--1/4 cup spring onions, chopped 
--1/4 cilantro, chopped

Assembly
1. Grate the cauliflower, using a hand grater if at all possible (even I did not use the food processor this time!). Keep in a separate bowl.
2. Mince and dice and chop all the the other ingredients (carrots, onions, garlic, shrimp, spring onions, and cilantro).  Keep each separate.
3. In one pan, heat 1 TBS oil over medium heat.  Add the cauliflower, spreading out in as thin a layer as possible.  Cook for at least five minutes, or until it begins to brown.
4. In the other pan, heat 2 TBS oil.  Add onions and cook until fragrant and translucent, 2-3 minutes.  Then, add the garlic and carrots. Cook over med-high heat, until carrots are soft (5-7 minutes).
5. While the vegetables are cooking, mix together all the sauce ingredients. Now you have a delicious sauce.
6. Back to the cauliflower--once you have a good portion of browned "rice," make a well in the middle of the cauliflower. Add eggs and toss around, until the rice becomes light and fluffy and egg is cooked. Keep warm over low heat, stirring occasionally.
7. Once the carrots are softened, add the shrimp and cook until done all the way through.
8. Add the cauliflower to the vegetables and toss evenly. Garnish with cilantro and spring onions.
9. Separate into servings and use sauce evenly among the plates.

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Occupy the Grocery Store: Slow Cooker Mustard Brussels Sprouts

Last week I did something crazy--I met up with some friends the night before I had to work and stayed out until 10:30 PM, which is WAY past bedtime. The resulting "Nurses Gone Wild" video should be released in time for Christmas delivery.

But seriously--it was getting late and I had nothing to eat for lunch during the 12.5 hour shift the next day. Not wanting to brave the hospital cafeteria, I peered into my refrigerator and came up with... a bag of brussels sprouts.

Without time to DO anything with said brussels sprouts (btw: did everyone else know that it's brusselS sprouts, not bussel sprouts?)--a quick google search popped up with a very short slow-cooker recipe for mustard sprouts.  If ever a recipe towed the line between absolutely delightful and dreadfully terrible, this was it  Three minutes, six ingredients, and a few too-short hours of sleep later, I woke up to the most delicious smell in my kitchen and a yummy lunch that earned the envy of most of the break room.

Don't like the lighting? You wake up at 515 am and see
how much natural light your kitchen gets. 

Slow Cooker Mustard Brussels Sprouts

Ingredients

• 1 lb brussel sprouts (1 16oz bag), washed
• 3 TBS oil
• 1 TBS dijon mustard (some mustards have sugar in them--check ingredients if you care)
• 1/2 tsp black pepper
• 1/4 tsp kosher salt
• 1/4 cup water
• 1 washed sweet potato, skin still on (optional--I just need more to eat!)

Assembly
1. Wash the sprouts. Chop off the small stem at the bottom, and then halve them.
2. Throw everything in the slow cooker.
3. Heat on low overnight. The ones that are right against the walls will get a little crispy, and that is great.
4. If you used a sweet potato, it will be so soft you can just mash it up and use as a base for the dish.

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Spanakopita, Deconstructed

I've made no secret about it: spanakopita, practically the national dish of Greece, is no favorite of mine.  This indifference is, in large part, owed to the strong contrarian spirit that dominates at least two-thirds of my opinions ("Oh, you think puppies are cute? Let me tell you why I find that to be misguided...")-- but mostly it's just because I'd rather be eating my Aunt Lena's eggplant pie.  Why eat a spinach/lemon/feta concoction when you could be sinking your teeth into an amazing amalgamation of eggplant, tomato, and onion? I rest my case.

But, alas. Winter is coming and the days of eggplant for $0.99/lb (thank you New Jersey, third-largest eggplant producer in the world) are over. Way over. Seems the only things under $2.49/lb these days are greens. Mustard greens, spinach greens, beet greens. Spinach. Arugula. Kale. It's a slow boat ride back to berry season-- but at least we'll be full of iron.

So what's a good Greek girl to do? Break down and deal with the hand nature deals the Northeast or spend $86/week on groceries? With my hand forced, I turned to spinach.

I came up with this take on creamed spinach--a cornucopia of uber-Greekness. Olive oil, spinach, dill, creamy yogurt... it's almost enough to make me forget about that eggplant pie.

Almost.

Deconstructed Spanakopita, or: "Creamed" Spinach

Pay no attention to the pre-made salmon patty on the left.

Ingredients

•  9 oz spinach, rinsed and dried
• 1 medium-large bunch of kale, rinsed, dried, and shredded from the thick center vein
• 1 bunch dill, bottoms cut off and chopped into thirds
• 1 large onion, chopped roughly
• 4 garlic cloves, chopped roughly
• 2 tsp oregano
• 2 TBS olive oil 
• 7 oz Greek yogurt (Fage is best, but you do you)

Assembly  
**I made this with my food processor--if you don't have one, just finely mince the onions/garlic and skip the shredding of the greens. It won't have the same texture but the option's there.**

 1. Puree the onion and garlic together in food processor. Set aside.

2. Throw the kale in a big, deep pot. If you have room, throw the spinach in there too--otherwise, cook separately.  To cook, add a splash of water and cover the pot, heating over med-high heat.  After 2-3 minutes, open the pot and stir thoroughly to distribute the heat. Cook for another 1-2 minutes, until the greens are wilted (note: the kale will take longer so, if cooking together, make sure it is on the bottom first so it gets most of the heat).

3. Place the greens in a colander to strain the excess water. Use a spatula to press out any additional water.

4. Heat the olive oil and oregano in a saute pan over medium heat until fragrant, about 2 minutes. Pour the onion/garlic puree into the pan and mix with the oil.  Allow to heat over medium until fragrant and slightly carmelized,  6-8 minutes.

5. While the onion mixture cooks, run the spinach, kale, and dill through the food processor until it is a pulp. Set aside.

6. Once fragrant, take about 1/3 of the onion puree (does not have to be exact) and set aside to cool.  Add the pulped greens to the remainder and mix well to combine.  Cook all together for another 3-4 minutes, until spinach is heated as well.

7. While spinach heats, combine cooled onion puree with yogurt and mix well.

8. Once spinach is heated, combine  spinach and yogurt mixture. Enjoy!

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Chocolate Chestnut Pie

Chestnuts and figgy pudding are two of a kind. Everyone sings about them, but no one actually eats them. Always a bridesmaid, never a bride.

Luckily for chestnuts, Thanksgiving at the Kef Household lets them shine once a year--MamaKef has always loved adding chestnuts to her stuffing (though I'm sad to report I have yet to see her roast them over an open fire).  This year, we also threw some chestnuts over our roasted sweet potatoes to a spectacular result.  And this got the Kefwheels turning...

What else can we do with these creamy, delicious treats?

What we have today is a subtle, rich pie that ups the ante and will ensure that chestnuts get more respect than just a passing Carol reference.  A more sophisticated version of a diner chocolate mousse pie, it's sure to please anyone who makes it to your holiday buffet.  It is most definitely not a traditional pie--but I'll bet it comes back year after year, anyway.

Sorry, figgy pudding-- maybe someone will actually eat you next year.

I adapted this recipe, whose pictures are nicer.

Ingredients

     --1 can (15 oz) chestnut puree

     --1 bag (9 oz) unsweetened carob chips (if you want to use chocolate, use dark)

     --1 and 3/4 sticks of butter (room temperature), cut into small pieces 

     -- 2 TBS whiskey, cognac, or dark rum
-------------
 --1 c almond meal
--1/2 c coconut flour
--1/2 c carob powder (or cocoa powder)
-- 1 tsp baking soda
-- 2 eggs, beaten
-- 1/8 c honey or maple syrup (more or less, to taste?
-- 1/2 tsp vanilla extract
-- 3 TBS butter, cu into small pieces and softened to room temp 
--OR baked pie crust of choice (Try this pistachio crust)

Assembly
1. For the crust: if you're using your own crust, assemble and bake as directed. Otherwise, preheat oven to 325.  For the sugar-free, gluten-free cookie crust, combine both flours, carob/cocoa powder, and baking soda. Mix well. Add the wet ingredients except the butter and mix until combined. Then add the butter in small pieces, kneading with your fingers until you have a cohesive dough.

2. Press the dough into a buttered pie pan to form the crust. If you don't need all of the dough, use the extra to make cookies- you can use that for a topping. Use a fork to poke holes all over the crust and bake for 9-10 minutes, or until middle is set. Do not overcook- the dough is very dark so it will be hard to tell that it's burnt! Remove from oven and let cool completely.

3. To make the filling, fill a large sauce pan 2/3 full with water and heat over med-high.  Put the carob chips in a small metal bowl or smaller pot and hold over the heated water (but don't let bottom touch water or chips will burn).  Stir constantly to spread heat evenly.  

4. Once melted,  remove from heat and mix in butter, a piece or two at a time, so that it melts into the mixture.

5. Add chestnut puree and mix until combined.  Add vanilla and liquor. Taste mixture and if desired, add more vanilla to sweeten.

6. Pour mixture into pre-made crust and cool in fridge for at least 4 hours (overnight if you have the time).  Use a spatula to even out the top (which I clearly did not do in the above picture).

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Sweet Potato Ricotta Gnocchi with Pumpkin Cream Sauce

Queijo Kef and I will always have Fall.  The birthdays, the pumpkin, the scarves... it's enough to make two working women spend all day emailing each other delicious-looking pumpkin-themed treats. Oh wait...

A few weeks ago, these sweet potato and ricotta gnocchi were the object of our 9-to-5 distraction.  I have always wanted to toss my hat into the ring of gnocchi-building and, cheered by Queijo Kef's enthusiasm, these seemed like the place to start. 

I followed this recipe for the gnocchi themselves, and then doctored up the sauce to include (what else?) PUMPKIN!

And finally--one of the most valuable culinary lessons was bestowed on to me many moons ago when I was just Kefaki, and I shall now bestow it unto you.  The "gn" makes a sound very similar to the "ny" in Kenya-- so this word is pronouned "nyoki." No hard "g." Pass it on.

Sweet Potato Ricotta Gnocchi with Pumpkin Cream Sauce

Ingredients

• 2 lbs sweet potatoes
• 1 egg yolk
• 2/3 cup whole milk ricotta, drained
• 1-1 ½ cups flour (I used all-purpose GF. You do you.), separated into 1/2 c and two 1/4 c portions
• 1/4 tsp grated nutmeg
• 1/2 tsp cinnamon

----

• 1/2 c coconut milk
• 1 c heavy cream
• 1/2 c pureed pumpkin (Libby's is the best, but use whatcha got)
• 2 TBS butter
• 3 TBS flour (I again, I used GF)
• 1/4 tsp salt
• 1.5 tsp cumin
• pepper to taste
• 3/4-1 c gruyere cheese, shredded

---

• kale, washed and shredded. 

Assembly

1. For the gnocchi: Preheat the oven to 425. Bake the sweet potatoes until tender all the way through when poked with a fork, which will take 30-45 minutes depending on the size of the potato. Once done, rip open the skins and dump the hot flesh into a large mixing bowl (this is beginning to sound like an episode of Dexter...). Using a fork, mash the potatoes and move them around so a thin layer forms around the bowl--basically, you just want to avoid having a heap o' potato that will trap the heat and get mushy. Let cool to room temp.

2. Drizzle the yolk, shred the ricotta, and sprinkle 1/2 c flour over the potatoes. Cut them into the potatoes using a spatula.  When combined, add an additional 1/4 c flour and combine (you will probably need to use your hands at this point).  Form the dough into a ball. If dough is not firm (cookie dough consistency), add another 1/4 c flour.

3. From the ball, shape the dough into a compact rectangle and let rest for 5 minutes.

4. Cut log into 8 individual segments. Roll one segment out at a time into 1” thick logs--resist the temptation to do this between your hands and use a cutting board for even rolling. Cut logs into individual pieces, about 1”. It will begin to look like this:

5. Cut your logs into individual gnocchi pieces and place them on a baking sheet. Refrigerate if you're not going to make sauce and cook gnocchi right away. You will have about 60 pieces--whatever is left you can freeze (first on a baking sheet to avoid sticking together, then in a freezer bag)  and cook later easily!

For the sauce:
1. Combine coconut milk, cream, and pumpkin. Heat over medium heat until warm--be careful not to let it scald or boil. Set aside.
2. Melt butter over medium heat. Add flour and salt, whisk together. It will get clumpy.
3. Add the heated pumpkin mixture. Whisk constantly until sauce thickens, 3-4 minutes.
4. Remove from heat. Add spices and cheese. Whisk to combine.  Set aside, stirring occasionally to avoid the formation of sauce skin (if you've ever seen it... you know what I mean).

To combine:
1. Bring a large pot of water to boil.  Add gnocchi.  Allow to cook 2-3 minutes. They are done when they float to the top (it is awesome!).
2. While gnocchi cook, place shredded kale on plate. 
3. When gnocchi are finished, pull them out of the boiling water with a slotted spoon to strain. Place directly on kale. Add desired amount of sauce. Serve immediately.

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